I feel absolutely dreadful these past few days. I hope it’s just a reaction to the stomach thing, not a sudden depressive relapse. I could burst into tears and never stop (it feels as if) or worse. But that would be giving in. I have this awful sense of loss. Just survive. Just survive. I can’t explain it. Trying to think about other people but only the ones that make me sad come to mind. Survive, endure; not explain.